Wednesday 15 April 2009
Would you like a bag with that?
If I you blatantly don't need a bag, and you take one from me, you'll get no please or thank you, no money off coupon, or whatever free thing we're giving away that week, you inconsiderate planet killing bastards. Especially you fucks who take a bag then shove it inside another.
Monday 13 April 2009
Bank Holiday Monday
Sanitary towel stuck to the toilet seat...kids throwing magazines over the cafe balcony narrowly missing hitting a woman square on the head...a guy smoking crack in the toilets...
Bank Holiday Mondays suck even more than normal Mondays.
Bank Holiday Mondays suck even more than normal Mondays.
Friday 10 April 2009
The Pedants
We have a lot of events on at the shop, author signings and the like, and we print out flyers for them and have them around the store. Recently I was at the main info desk and a guy, maybe mid twenties, came over and gave me a piece of paper, saying, 'can I just give you that?' I said, 'sure', as I thought it was maybe a flyer for an event he was promoting. I had a look at it, it was one of ours, and the last part of the sentence read, 'as it celebrates it's 10th anniversary'. This guy had written, in very spidery writing, 'there is no apostrophe in the possessive pronoun'. As I looked it over, he said, 'you are a book shop, you should know better', as he scuttled away from me. My opinion? He should get a life! 
I mean, he's right, but come on, is that really such a pressing issue that he feels he needs to draw it to our attention? It's a typo after all...
Reminded me of three different women who complained in the card shop I worked in many moons ago. The first made a big issue out of our sign in the window, hastily handwritten, that said 'all stationery now half price'...and the second complained that our halloween sign only had on 'L' in it, the other that it should be spelt hallow'een (Wrong!!). Yes, so we had some incorrectly spelt signage, but really necessary to make such a fuss?? Really??
I know handwriting and grammar is very, very important, but are people who point this out really upholders of the proper usage or are they just anal? I want to kill whenever I go into a fruit and veg shop that has inappropriate use of apostrophes round words, (are they apples or 'apples'??) but I don't say anything to anybody. Should I? Or is life just too short? The latter, if you ask me!
I mean, he's right, but come on, is that really such a pressing issue that he feels he needs to draw it to our attention? It's a typo after all...
Reminded me of three different women who complained in the card shop I worked in many moons ago. The first made a big issue out of our sign in the window, hastily handwritten, that said 'all stationery now half price'...and the second complained that our halloween sign only had on 'L' in it, the other that it should be spelt hallow'een (Wrong!!). Yes, so we had some incorrectly spelt signage, but really necessary to make such a fuss?? Really??
I know handwriting and grammar is very, very important, but are people who point this out really upholders of the proper usage or are they just anal? I want to kill whenever I go into a fruit and veg shop that has inappropriate use of apostrophes round words, (are they apples or 'apples'??) but I don't say anything to anybody. Should I? Or is life just too short? The latter, if you ask me!
Well Heeled Wummin
I was unemployed for many a year, and I kept the madness at bay by working in various charity shops. Man, I thought those customers were odd, but in the past few months I have discovered that there are far crazier people out there. They are the Bookshop Customer.
The other day I had an experience so bizarre I actually got a headache for about 20 minutes after it. I was lying awake during the night afterwards replaying it in my head (bad habit that).
I was on a late shift, so arrived on shop floor for my first tills shift a little after 1:30, served about 3 customers. A slight lull, then a customer comes over. Well Heeled Lady, dressed well, speaks with a fairly posh accent.
(I paraphrase slightly as I cannot recall the entire conversation, the rage shut my brain down.)
Me: Hello, how can I help?
WHL: (in very loud angry voice, which she uses throughout the conversation) I have a complaint, I bought this book on Saturday and I've been overcharged.
She shows me her receipt, then the book. Sure enough, book has £6.99 printed on it, but a (Damnit I have no Euro symbol!!) Euro10.45 price sticker on it.
Me: Ok, no problem.
WHL: Oh but it IS a problem!
Me: Sorry, I meant it's no problem to refund you the difference.
WHL: Well I should hope not!
Me: I can only apologise, it's been priced accidentally.
WHL: Does that happen often?
Me: Oh no, every now and than, but it's a glitch that we should catch before it reaches shop floor.
WHL: Yes, that's all very well, but you cannot get away with that!
Me: With what? Sorry?
WHL: Ripping people off!! If you're replacing £ prices with Euro ones, and hoping nobody notices, you're ripping people off!!
Me: Oh no, it's not like that, it's an accident!
WHL: You cannot charge a Euro price on something if there is a £ price and call that an accident! If you do that on every book in here you're making an obscene profit!!
Me: No, no, I assure you, the sticker was printed accidentally, it should never have been put on this book. It was a total accident, not done on purpose.
(All the time I'm working on the till, scanning the book, refunding her the difference. I give her the receipt and the money. She's wittering on a lot and I'm trying to concentrate on both tasks at once.)
WHL: (looks at £3.46 I've given her and says) Is that all you're giving me?
Me: Yes, that's the difference, the amount you were overcharged.
WHL: Well that's disgraceful. I'm going to make a complaint about this, you are ripping people off and being blatant about it!!
(by this time a substantial queue has built up behind her and people are looking pissed off. Now, this is where it goes extremely pear shaped, and embarrassing for me, as I have no idea why I thought what I did. Rage rage, I suppose. She picks up the book.)
Me: No! You cannot keep the book, I have refunded you! (for some reason my enraged brain thought I had fully refunded her!! Why?!?!)
WHL: WHAT???!?!??!?!?!!?!!!!
Me: (realising my error) Oh!! NO, sorry, you are right, for some reason I thought I had fully refunded you! I'm sorry! You confused me!
WHL: I confused you???? WELL...The Citizens Advice Bureau will hear of THIS!!!!
(stomps off)
Why I thought that...I don't know. She flummoxed me with her constant whiny voice snipping away at me as I tried, on more than one occasion, to apologise and explain. The staff on either side of me were asking, 'what just happened?? What was she on??!!'
About half an hour later I had a similar complaint, a man had bought books on a 3 for 2 offer and realised after he had paid that he had been charged for all 3. I apologised, refunded him the difference, and he said, 'don't worry, these things happen'. Laughed about it. What a difference in personality!!
The other day I had an experience so bizarre I actually got a headache for about 20 minutes after it. I was lying awake during the night afterwards replaying it in my head (bad habit that).
I was on a late shift, so arrived on shop floor for my first tills shift a little after 1:30, served about 3 customers. A slight lull, then a customer comes over. Well Heeled Lady, dressed well, speaks with a fairly posh accent.
(I paraphrase slightly as I cannot recall the entire conversation, the rage shut my brain down.)
Me: Hello, how can I help?
WHL: (in very loud angry voice, which she uses throughout the conversation) I have a complaint, I bought this book on Saturday and I've been overcharged.
She shows me her receipt, then the book. Sure enough, book has £6.99 printed on it, but a (Damnit I have no Euro symbol!!) Euro10.45 price sticker on it.
Me: Ok, no problem.
WHL: Oh but it IS a problem!
Me: Sorry, I meant it's no problem to refund you the difference.
WHL: Well I should hope not!
Me: I can only apologise, it's been priced accidentally.
WHL: Does that happen often?
Me: Oh no, every now and than, but it's a glitch that we should catch before it reaches shop floor.
WHL: Yes, that's all very well, but you cannot get away with that!
Me: With what? Sorry?
WHL: Ripping people off!! If you're replacing £ prices with Euro ones, and hoping nobody notices, you're ripping people off!!
Me: Oh no, it's not like that, it's an accident!
WHL: You cannot charge a Euro price on something if there is a £ price and call that an accident! If you do that on every book in here you're making an obscene profit!!
Me: No, no, I assure you, the sticker was printed accidentally, it should never have been put on this book. It was a total accident, not done on purpose.
(All the time I'm working on the till, scanning the book, refunding her the difference. I give her the receipt and the money. She's wittering on a lot and I'm trying to concentrate on both tasks at once.)
WHL: (looks at £3.46 I've given her and says) Is that all you're giving me?
Me: Yes, that's the difference, the amount you were overcharged.
WHL: Well that's disgraceful. I'm going to make a complaint about this, you are ripping people off and being blatant about it!!
(by this time a substantial queue has built up behind her and people are looking pissed off. Now, this is where it goes extremely pear shaped, and embarrassing for me, as I have no idea why I thought what I did. Rage rage, I suppose. She picks up the book.)
Me: No! You cannot keep the book, I have refunded you! (for some reason my enraged brain thought I had fully refunded her!! Why?!?!)
WHL: WHAT???!?!??!?!?!!?!!!!
Me: (realising my error) Oh!! NO, sorry, you are right, for some reason I thought I had fully refunded you! I'm sorry! You confused me!
WHL: I confused you???? WELL...The Citizens Advice Bureau will hear of THIS!!!!
(stomps off)
Why I thought that...I don't know. She flummoxed me with her constant whiny voice snipping away at me as I tried, on more than one occasion, to apologise and explain. The staff on either side of me were asking, 'what just happened?? What was she on??!!'
About half an hour later I had a similar complaint, a man had bought books on a 3 for 2 offer and realised after he had paid that he had been charged for all 3. I apologised, refunded him the difference, and he said, 'don't worry, these things happen'. Laughed about it. What a difference in personality!!
Monday 6 April 2009
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